The Rest of My Life With You
by fanaticd12
Summary: "I just want to spend every possible minute of the rest of my life with you." ― Suzanne Collins, Catching Fire . Katniss and Peeta's road to love and marriage was filled with obstacles. Will their journey to having a family be the same? Sequel to Journey to Happiness. Rated M for language and lemons.
1. Chapter 1

**The Rest of My Life With You**

**A/N** : Hello again! This story picks up where _Journey To Happiness_ left off, so if you haven't read it you might want to. I will refer to _J.T.H_ sometimes and you might not know what's going on if you haven't read it. I'm not quite ready to follow a weekly schedule with this story just yet but I thought I'd give you a taste of what's to come. As always reviews are much appreciated. They inspire me to keep going. I love your feedback and ideas.

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**Daylight**

As I lie in the meadow I can feel the warm summer breeze against my skin.I can hear laughter in the background that fills me with greater warmth than the breeze provides. As I open my eyes I can see the daisies swaying as if they're dancing to music only they can hear. The golden sun light filters through the leaves of the willow tree I am laying under .

"Come play with us lazy-bones." Peeta says as he approaches me and begins nuzzling my neck with his nose.

"Uggh you're all sweaty. Get off of me." I say playfully.

"You love me." He says kissing my lips.

He's right I do love him, sweat and all. As I lay there in marital bliss I can't help but think of how far we've come. It seems like only yesterday that we weren't even speaking. A situation created by terrible communication and years of hurt feelings. As we kiss I can hear giggling in the background and then "EWWW, yuck!"

Peeta takes his lips off mine and goes to the sound, "What do you mean ewww? You should be happy I love your mommy so much." he says chasing two small children around the trunk of the willow tree. The golden light from the meadow is gleaming in my eyes and I can't make out the children's faces. They're just out of my reach. The light gets brighter and brighter until I can't see anything except it's glow. This is when I wake up confused by my happiness.

* * *

As I awaken I'm staring into Peeta's crystal blue eyes. This is one of my favorite changes to my life since our wedding a month ago. Every morning I get to wake up with Peeta's arms surrounding me or his eyes staring into mine.

"Good morning." He whispers while brushing a piece of hair from my eyes. "You were smiling in your sleep."

"I was?" I say groggily, "well that's a nice change from the screaming I usually do." I joke and kiss his forehead.

"What were you dreaming about?" he asks.

I hesitate to answer him. I know how badly Peeta wants kids and the idea is out of the question for me. I'm taken by surprise that I had such a pleasant dream including children because I'm usually terrified by the thought. The topic of children has come up often over the past few years. Peeta always argues that I'd be a great mother and that the world is safe for kids now. I always argue that safety is unstable and so am I. This is why I can't let him in on the real focus of my dream. Instead I tell him…

"You." _I'm not technique lying,_ I think to myself. " I was dreaming about you. You're even making me smile in my sleep." I say kissing his neck and rising from the bed.

"Wait! Where are you going." he groans.

"To take a shower." I strip off the t-shirt and underwear I was wearing and enter the bathroom.

"You can't kiss me, take off you're cloths and then walk away. That's cruel! " He yells from the bedroom.

"My Mom, Annie, and the baby will be here any minute." I yell from the shower.

"And…"

"And I don't want to traumatize my mom and Annie by having them walk in on us... you know."

I begin to let the warm water of the shower wash the sleep from my eyes.I hear the bathroom door close behind me as Peeta brushes his teeth.

"They were both newlyweds once. They'll understand." he mumbles with a mouth full of tooth paste.

I peek out of the shower at him while he rinse his mouth out. His unruly hair is flopping in his eyes. The grey pajama bottoms he wears hang on his hips in a way that make me feel warm to my core. I love everything about his body and it's even more of a turn on to me that no one will ever get to have him again except for me. Peeta catches me staring at him and gets a cocky smirk on his face.

"What are you looking at?" he says in a low sexy voice.

"I was just thinking about how filthy you look."

"Really?" he says as he slowly approaches the shower.

" Mmhmm. I would be rude to greet guest when you're so dirty. You should probably take a shower." I whisper as I remove his pajama bottoms.

"Well I wouldn't want to be rude." He replies before joining me in the shower and capturing my mouth in his.

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**A/N** : As I said it's just a little taste of what's to come but I hope you liked it. Thanks for reading and please review, favorite, and follow if you are interested . :)


	2. Realizations

**So here's Ch.2. I was sick when I finished it so I apologize for any typos etc. :)**

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Realizations

"How do you know?" I say to him with my voice full of trepidation.

"I just do. Have some faith."Peeta says winking at me as he dresses himself.

"Surprisingly, that doesn't make me feel any better." I respond under my breath and begin gnawing on my fingernails. I have no idea how he always stays so calm when there's a possible catastrophe on the horizon.

Peeta shakes his head and kneels next to the bed where I'm sitting wrapped in my towel from the shower we just took. He grabs my chin, forcing me to look into his eyes.

" Everything is planned out, we've been over it a hundred times. Plutarch and his vultures won't be here until day after tomorrow. Everyone we love will be here to day. Plutarch knows if he comes early with the cameras his "exclusive" rights to our toasting will be null &void. He'll never know we did the real toasting early and will do the fake meaningless toasting for the cameras once Plutarch arrives. The plan's fool proof so stop worrying."

"It just doesn't make sense to me. He never has been respectful of privacy before why now."

"I made it worth his while. You know what a glory hog Plutarch is. He wanted to be the only one to cover the toasting .Why is that so hard to believe?"

"I don't know it just…" I look over at Peeta and I can see he isn't telling me something. "Peeta? What else did you promise him?" His guilty expression has me even more nervous than before .Oh God ! What did he say we'd do? I envision cameras in my house, the bakery, even following me into the woods interrupting my peace.

"Alright, I might have promised him hmhmhmhm." The last part of his sentence comes out as a soft mumble.

"What ? Peeta what the hell did you promise him?" I rise from the bed in a panic practically knocking him over.

"I promised he could have exclusive rights to … the first photos of our baby… when we have one that is." He squeezes his eyes shut bracing himself for my reaction.

"You WHAT!?" I yell in shock.

"Katniss calm down. You've made it very clear you don't want kids. I promised him photos of a fictional child we're never having. What's the big deal?"

I stomp around the room grabbing the nearest shirt and pants I can reach. Once I throw my clothes on I storm down the stairs and head out the door.

"You're overreacting." He yells to me as I stomp off toward the woods with my bow in hand.

* * *

Once in the woods I easily take down four rabbits and trap a covey of quail. I'm still fuming with anger and decide to retreat to the solitude of the meadow. As I gather wild blackberries and mint I begin to relax and ask myself what it is I'm actually angry about. _He should have told me _I think to myself ._That must be why I'm so angry. I hate it when people keep things from always has brilliant plans that he never feels the need to let me in_ But deep down I know that's not the reason.

I soon lay down under the shade of a nearby willow tree to rest and I'm reminded of the dream I had this morning. We were so happy , our little family. There was laughter and love. Why wouldn't I want that? What's wrong with me? I lye there for a while asking myself question upon question that all lead to a terrifying realization. I do want a family. I would love to watch Peeta raise children and have someone we created that is a piece of him & I together. I would think that this new found feeling would fill me with warmth like the light in my dream , however instead I feel a tightness in my chest. I sit up and find myself gasping for air.I can't breathe or stop my heart from racing. No! I can't have kids. What if the government decides to use them in some way , like they have Peeta & I? Not to mention the terrors of everyday life, accidents, starvation, matter what my heart wants this panic I'm feeling reminds me the world is full of cruelty, greed, and horrors that I could never subject those carefree children to, that I saw in my dream.I leave the woods today even more resolved to never bring children into this world.

* * *

As I enter the house I can here Peeta counting in a sweet voice that's unlike his usual tone.

"8…9…10 ready or not here I come. Hmmmm I have no idea where Finn could he behind this pillow?" I walk in to see two stubby legs peeking out from behind a curtain and I hear little Finn's uncontrollable laughter .Apparently the three year old hasn't quite mastered the hiding part of hide and go seek. Peeta keeps up the charade looking everywhere but the obvious spot where Finn is hiding. " Oh well .I give up I just think I'll open the curtains so I can see better… A ha !"

Finn screams and takes off running but Peeta scoops him up and starts tickling him saying " I found you! I win!". They both look so happy and I can't help but wonder what he'd be like with a son or daughter of his own. I take in a deep sigh as I watch them . This makes my presence know to the wild pair of boys.

"Hey when did you come in?" Peeta asks a little out of breath.

"Just a few seconds ago…" This is the first time I've ever met Finnick and Annie's son in person. Peeta lived with Annie for the months when we were apart, and apparently bonded well with little Finn. His eyes and golden hair are identical to Finnick's . "Hi Finn.I'm Katniss , it's nice to finally meet you." I say kneeling so I can get down level. The toddler walks up to Peeta , tugs on his pant leg, and whispers something to him.

"You have good taste." Peeta says while rustling Finn's golden hair " Why don't you go in the back yard and tell your mommy that Katniss is here." With that Little Finn runs off leaving Peeta and I alone.

"What did he say?" I ask as Peeta approaches me wrapping his arms around my waist.

"He said you were pretty. He 's already a ladies man just like his dad." We both give a sad laugh remembering our friend. I rest my head on Peeta's chest listening to his heat beat."Hey, are we okay? Do you still hate me?"he asks.

"I could never hate you.I love you too much. " I mumble into his shirt." I'm sorry I overreacted."

"Look at me. Are you crying?" he says raising my face from his chest.

I wasn't even aware but as I raise my head I see Peeta's shirt is speckled with water marks. Watching him with Finn just made me realize all the more that he was meant to be a father.I feel guilt and sadness because I know I'm not strong enough to give him what he deserves or brave enough to put aside my fears and embrace what I know would probably make me happy.

"Katniss, talk to me what's wrong?"he looks concerned and I know I can't tell him what's really wrong, for the same reason I couldn't tell him about my dream.I can't admit to him that I fantasized about having a family with him .I can't say that out loud.

" I'm fine.I just have a lot of emotions running around my head right now... the toasting , missing Finnick…I'll be fine really, I already feel better." My words are soon interrupted by the slight shove of Peeta being pushed into me and a loud…

"You're it!" as Finn yells and pushes on Peeta's legs.

"Ooh you better run because I'm gonna get you." Finn takes off screaming. Peeta kisses my lips and says " I love you but I'm it.I have a job to do." Then he smiles and chases after Finn.

He is a natural with kids and I love seeing him like this. Burying these feelings I'm having is going to be a lot harder to avoid than I thought.

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**Thanks all the reviews, follows, and favorites. Keep um coming . Until next time :)**


	3. Strength

**Hello again! Here is the latest ch. of ****_Rest of My Life. It definitely has smut so 18+ readers only please. _**

**_Strength_**

After I've cleaned the days kill and then cleaned myself I venture down stairs. I visit with Annie while Finn draws on some paper that Peeta gave him. Annie has definitely changed since I last saw her. Little Finn has been a sort of medicine for her, she isn't the same broken girl I remember from 13. My mother moved into their house with the intention of helping Annie with Finn once Peeta left, however I think she helps with Annie's needs just as much. It seems like a good pairing for both. Annie and my Mother have little family left and can relate to one another. Once I notice Annie is losing focus I excuse myself from our visit. I can tell that she needs to rest and to be honest long conversations aren't really my thing either.

I follow the sound of Peeta's voice to the back yard where I see him visiting with my mother. He is asking her about some of the herbs we planted in the garden. It is so effortless for him to make people feel comfortable and valued. My mother and him are laughing and happy when I approach and I envy the ease that they speak with.

I've spoken to my mother a few times on the phone since I left thirteen but seeing her face to face is still awkward and tense. We were slowly growing together prior to the Quell and a little in 13 however Prim was always there to act like the buffer between us. Whenever things got too cold or tense Prim would make a joke or tell a story and we had something else to focus on. I try to get the courage to interrupt their conversation but the thought of speaking to my mom alone only reminds me of how much I need my sister. Soon Finn calls Peeta to come look at his drawings and both of their attention is drawn to me.

"Hey ! How long have you been standing there?" Peeta asks.

"Not long .What are you doing?"

"I was just asking your mom about some of these herbs, but I have to go see what the little artist created in there .I'll be back okay."I know my eyes tell him not to leave but he just kisses me and then nudges me in my mom's direction. I take a seat on the garden bench as she prunes some of the plants.

"Oh Katniss! I didn't even see you sneak up."

"Hi mom…um how was your trip?" It's all I can think of to ask other than _how's the weather in 4?_ This woman gave birth to me , we've shared life changing events yet I can't even look her in the eye. The uncomfortable silence that fills the gaps of our conversation only remind me of Prim's absence and I want nothing more than to run and hide.

"Bumpy I suppose. It was my first train ride. Finn loved it though.I don't think he fell asleep once." then there's more silence. We sit there staring into the empty air until Peeta saves us.

"Mrs. Everdeen , I think Annie needed help finding something for Finn." My mom thanks Peeta and leaves to attend to Annie. "So , did you have a nice talk with your mom?" He asks and sits next to me on the garden bench. I shrug my shoulders and kick a lump of dirt on the garden's floor. Peeta lets out a frustrated sigh.

"You need to at least try to let her in Katniss."

"What do you mean?" I say a little shocked. Peeta never interferes with my mother & my relationship.

" I know your relationship is different."

"Different?" I say with a snort.

" What I'm trying to say is , I know things are not easy between you two but at least you have family left. That's more than a lot of us can say." His words sting a little. Once again I'm reminded of how selfish I am. As strained as our relationship is, at least I have a mother who is alive and cares. Peeta has no one, at least not blood.

"You have to remember this can't be easy for her either, being here in 12. There are a lot of ghost here for her. I can't even imagine what she's going through. The fact that she's here to celebrate with us shows how much you mean to her. " I don't want to listen to him but I know he's right. As I turn to look into his concerned eyes my expression softens. I kiss him lightly and brush a golden curl from his eyes.

"I'll try.I wouldn't expect much, but I'll try." I tell him. Peeta seems to be content with this answer and stands up offering me a hand to rise from the bench.

* * *

The rest of the evening goes pretty well. Haymitch joins us for dinner and we share some laughs as he and my mom retell stories about the "Old Days". It's nice to see them reminisce about good things rather than whippings and starvation. Peeta and Finn fall asleep together on the couch and I stare at him wonder if it's possible that I love him even more than before.

"He's loves that boy." I hear a soft voice say behind me. I turn to find Annie who's caught me staring. My cheeks flush with embarrassment as I smile at her and nod my head in agreement and then I feel my eyes welling up _Oh god not now .Stop it ! _I tell myself_._ But my emotions aren't being obedient. All I can think of is how much Peeta does love Finn and how I can never give him a child of his own to love like that. I quickly wipe my tears away hoping nobody catches on . "You know I didn't want kids?" Annie says to me keeping her eyes locked on Little Finn as he drools on Peeta's chest. "Finnick tried convincing me for years to have them but I wanted no part of it. The reaping, the lies…so much ugliness, so much pain."she sounds worlds away, in a sort of trance.

"What changed your mind?" I ask snapping her back to reality.

"They controlled me for so long, The Capitol. Through fear and manipulation. One day I realized I was sick of them controlling only thing holding me back from starting a family was fear and I refused to be fearful anymore."

"Do you regret it?Now that Finnick's ….I'm sorry Annie I shouldn't …"I catch myself before I finish my sentence. What an idiot ! How could I say something like that to her?

"No it's okay. I actually did regret it at first. Finn was so little and vulnerable and I was all alone. I was constantly paranoid that I would wake up and he would be gone just like his daddy. But as time went by… I'm not sure what changed but I know I would do it again. I would do it again a hundred times over." Without saying another word she goes to the couch and scoops up her sleeping child. We say our goodbyes as they head over to my old house, where they'll be staying while in 12. Once everyone is out of the house I start cleaning up trying my hardest to be quiet and let Peeta continue sleeping. Soon I drop a pot in the sink a little too loudly and he startles awake.

"Sorry. I was trying to be quiet." I whisper.

"When did everyone leave?" Peeta asks groggily.

"About ten minutes ago. You looked so peaceful no one wanted to disturb you."He pats the couch next to him inviting me to sit .I lye down resting my head on his chest.

"Yuck, your shirt's all wet. Toddler drool." I say wiping off my cheek.

"Sorry .Here let me fix that." He says removing his shirt and exposing his bare chest.

You'd think I'd be use to seeing him with his shirt off by now but it still causes my heart to race.

"How's that lip taste ?"Apparently I started biting my lip. It's a bad habit I have .It gives me away every time I'm turned on and Peeta never misses it.

"It tastes really good. I'll share if you want." I say leaning in to capture his mouth in mine.

"Mmmmm." He growls into my mouth.

"Taste good?"

"Up stairs now!" is all he can get out before picking me up allowing both of his hands to wander over my thighs and bottom.

"The lights." I say giggling as he trails kisses down my neck.

He doesn't skip a beat and carries me over to every light switch in the room until we are in total darkness, never allowing his mouth to leave my body. By the time we get upstairs I'm ready to attack him. I start to rip his pants off his body .I can already feel his hardness through the thick material.

"Katniss wait." he says breathlessly. I stop what I'm doing and look at him startled" I think we should wait to have sex until after the toasting."

"What! Why?"

"I don't know. It's tradition and we've done everything else so backwards. It will make tomorrow night more special."

"You're telling me this now? Isn't that tradition meant for couples who have never had sex ?"I ask exasperated as I flop down on the bed in frustration.

"I said no sex not no….mmmmmmm."before I know it his face it buried in between my legs. He's massaging my folds with his tongue moaning as he goes. "God you taste so good."

"Ahhh Peeta. Slow down I'm gonna come if you keep…" but he's not listening. He dips two fingers inside of me and continues licking and nibbling my sex . "OH God .Peeta…Peeta..Peeta."I chant his name as if it's the only words I know and it's not long at all before I feel an immense wave of pleasure coupled with an intense release .A warm rush of liquid pools between my thighs and I start to flop down in exhaustion only he's not done with me yet. He gives me seconds to recover before his fingers are slipping over my sensitive clit again causing me to scream even louder than before. His mouth moves to my thighs as I arch my back and moan. He brings his perfect mouth to my breast sucking and nibbling each mound never loosing focus on the bundle of nerves between my legs.

"I love you.I love you so much." I whine as he works my body like a puppeteer. He knows all the right strings to pull to make me moan and writhe in ecstasy.

"I love you too baby." He whispers in my ear as he plunges multiple fingers inside of me causing me to cry out for more. " You like that?"he teases slowing down the speed of this pumping. It's torturous.

"Please Peeta ."I growl

"Please what baby ?How do you want it?"

"I want you inside of me." I growl.

"Well you can't have that , not until tomorrow. "

" Peeta .I cant take it I need you inside of me. Now!" Peeta bring his face to meet mine.

"You have to be stronger than me I won't leave you frustrated." He grabs my fingers and places them on my clit .

"I want you to touch yourself. We're going to make you come again .Would you like that?" his voice is low and heated. I love when he talk likes this in bed.

"Mmmm."Is all I can say .I feel like jumping out of my buriesskin. Soon he reburies his face in between my thigh only this time he plunges his tongue inside of me occasionally stopping to suck on the my thigh where the curve of my bottom begins. Then he trails his hands down grabbing my ass and causing my hips to jerk up .I can't focus on what my hands are doing anymore I begin clawing at the sheets and then grabbing Peeta's hair. He has my legs over his shoulders now and I feel like a wild animal unable to control the noises and movements my body is making. I need him inside of me one way or another .I quickly unwrap my legs from Peeta's neck and push him down on his back. I straddle his torso with my back facing him .

"God I love your ass." He says glance over my shoulder at him. He never talks this dirty he must be really turned on.

"You still don't want sex ?" I say as I rub my lower half back and forth and take his hardness in my hand.

"Oh I want sex, but I'm being strong . Shit that feels good." Without warning I take his entire length into my mouth and begin sucking hard as I bob my head up and down over his length. He's making low guttural noises that encourage me to go on even though there is an unbearable throbbing between my thighs.

"Katiniss!uuuuuhhh!"I can tell he's almost there so I keep sucking. Suddenly I feel Peeta's mouth on my back side and then I feel his tongue trailing over my sex. _What is happening right now?_ All my senses are on overload and it takes everything within me to not lose control.I don't let up regardless of the urge I have to scream with pleasure. We are consuming one another together, faster and faster until I can't take anymore and let out a cry that sends Peeta over the edge along with me. My body is trembling and I have no words to describe what just happened.

* * *

We lay there for a while in stunned silence before I rise and get in the shower .I love that we have a shower that's attached to our bedroom. I allow the warm water to massage my sore muscles and enjoy the fresh feeling my skin has once I've scrubbed it clean.

"Do you want me to get your back? "I hear Peeta say as he joins me in the shower.

I nod my head in agreement and we take turns scrubbing one another.

"I think we need to change the sheets." I tell Peeta in a raspy voice.

"What happened to your voice it sounds like you were screaming or something?" Peeta says all too innocently.

"Very funny." I say rolling my eyes

After we change the bedding I cuddle up in bed next to Peeta and easily fall into a deep peaceful sleep. We're going to need it, as Effie would say tomorrows going to be a big ,big day.

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**Thanks for reading :) Let me know what you always reviews, favorites, and follows are much appreciated. **


	4. Traditions

I miss simplicity. Hunt, trade, protect, and repeat. That was my life and it seems so far removed from my reality now. The young girl who provided for her family and remained detached from the outside world is definitely a memory now. How would that girl feel about the day I have ahead of me? Would she believe me if I told her she would be married to the baker's son? Married…. and to Peeta of all people. She would never believe me. That Katniss swore off marriage and love yet here I am lying in bed watching my husband sleeping so peacefully and all I can think of is how much I love him and how I wish we could do this toasting by ourselves.

I reach out and lightly brush my fingertips through the waves of hair that are hanging in his eyes. I begin to wonder if our kids would have his hair or mine. I love his unruly golden hair. His eyes begin to flutter open and he smiles at me sleepily.

"Hey you." He whispers groggily.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to wake you." I say apologetically.

"Can't sleep?"

"Not really. Nerves I guess." I reply. Peeta grabs me and pulls me close.

"You know we're already legally married so you can't chicken out. You're officially stuck with me." He says kissing the top of my head.

"You aren't what I'm nervous about. You're the one thing I'm sure of." I say staring into his honest blue eyes.

"Thank you." He whispers to me.

"Thank you? For what, being a basket case? "Peeta smiles and buries his face in my hair , as he kisses the top of my head.

"No. For braving the crowds and your fears. I know you're going through with this for me. You'd probably be content if we lit a fire right now and pulled out some day old bread from the cupboards."

"Oooh is that an option?" I ask teasingly.

"No it's not. Go to sleep" He says , giving me one last kiss before we both close our eyes .

* * *

I awaken to find my bed cold.I turn to find a note on the pillow next to mine.

_I didn't want to wake you. I have a lot of errands to run for tonight and then I'm getting ready with the guys at your old place. Everyone else will be there to help set up so try to be nice. I'll see you tonight. I love you and don't worry._

_Always,_

_Peeta_

_Everyone else?_ Who is everyone else a_nd what needs to be set up?I thought all we needed was bread and fire? _I think to myself. This day is not off to a good start. I can already feel the pit forming in my stomach and I need to take a few deep breaths to stay calm. I remind myself that it's only one day and this is important to Peeta.

As I get dressed I can hear movement and bustling downstairs. Apparently "everyone" is here and they've already started setting up for the toasting. Once I dress I reluctantly head downstairs and brave the inevitable.

My living room is filled with people hustling around in a manner I can only accustom to bees surrounding a hive. Sae's busy in the kitchen while Delly is running back and forth placing flowers and cloths here and there .I catch a glimpse of Annie as she diverts Finn from pulling down Delly's carefully placed decorations and my mom sits at the kitchen table tying ribbons onto satchels of some kind. I have just decided to turn back around and sneak out the back door when I hear a familiar bubbly chirping that can only belong to one person.

"Well look who decided to join us! Where do you think you're off to Miss. We have a big big day ahead of us and you're already behind schedule thanks to the amount of time you've slept in."

"Hello Effie .It nice to see you. I didn't realize you'd be arriving so early." I say in a voice that is as excited as I can muster.

I was pretty adamant that I only wanted close family and friends to witness the toasting. Effie has been through a lot with Peeta and I and after much discussion we decided she belonged at our real toasting. She sticks out like a sore thumb in our drab district. Today Effie is sporting a canary yellow wig and a dress adorned with yellow and white feathers.

"Of course I'm here early. Who else would tend to the details of today and make sure no cameras invade this very exclusive event." She whispers to me in a top-secret voice. "Don't worry .I've got the house surrounded, Tom's on the porch. Vick and Rory are patrolling the perimeter of the house. There is no way any cameras will sneak their way into this special day. Now, let me take a look at you." She says while holding my arms out and rotating me around. "Honestly Katniss, would it kill you to let you nails grow out? I do wish you would have let me bring the prep team. They could do wonders for you. Oh well! We'll just have to make lemons from lemon aide, as they say."

Effie continues to ramble on about my day's itinerary, beauty regimen, and the proper manners to remember throughout the evening and my head begins to spin. I gladly welcome the loud , "Where the hell are you brainless?" that echoes through the hallway.

I race to Johanna hugging her tightly like a lifeline, "Thank god! Save me!" I whisper desperately in her ear.

"Effie I'm stealing the bride for a while we've got business to take care of."

"But what about her body polish and manicure."

"It can wait we've got hours. "Johanna says as she grabs my arm and pulls me toward the front door.

"Oh fine. I suppose I'm needed to organize the outdoor seating and decor, but hurry back there is much to do."

"Sure whatever you say." Johanna replies.

"I owe you big time!" I say to Johanna as I take a breath of fresh air.

"Anytime. I still can't believe you two invited Effie. She's enough to drive me all the way off the deep end." We share a laugh and continue on our walk.

* * *

After Johanna and I have roamed around District 12 for an hour, I realize I have to face the inevitable and we begin our walk back toward my house where I can only imagine , a bustle of activities and invasion of privacy await me.

Johanna leaves me to go get ready and I'm left to brave what's behind this door alone.I enter the house and I'm immediately hit with the sweet smell of wild flowers. Inside it's actually eerily quiet .The sitting room and stair railing is filled with hand tied bouquets and arrangements tied with white ribbons. Although I hated having everyone invading my home I have to admit the place actually looks really pretty. As I allow my eyes to take in the details my friends and family added to my home my eyes fall upon a worn intricately woven rug that sits in front of the fire-place where Peeta and I will do the toasting. I'm drawn to it for some reason. It's not strikingly pretty, in fact it's colors are faded and it's edges worn but it cause emotions to stir within me that are unexpected. My sentiment is interrupted by the soft sound of shuffling feet. I turn to find my mother standing behind me.

"When your father and I had our toasting it was just the two of us. Your grandparents disapproved of me marrying a miner and your father's family had passed away long before. On the night that I was set to leave my childhood home your great grandmother brought me this rug." Her eyes begin to gloss over with tears as she continues. " She explained to me that my grandfather and her had knelt on this rug for their toasting and they had a marriage of love and respect. She rolled it up, gave it to me, and that was the last time I ever spoke to her."

That's why it seemed familiar and tugged at my heart. I remember the rug from a photo of my parent's toasting.

"Mom…I um…thank you." The stress of the day and the kind gesture causes me to tear up and my mother comes to console me. For once in a long time I allow it. I rest my head on her shoulder as we share a long overdue embrace.

"I have one more thing for you, but don't feel obligated to … just follow me."

My mother leads me upstairs to my bedroom where I see something hanging in the closest.

"Is that your …"

"My dress. Yes it is."

"But I thought you sold it . " After my father's passing when times got really tough , my mother was forced to sell all of her old possession from her days as a merchant. Apparently she couldn't part with some of it.

"I tried Katniss, but I just couldn't bring myself to do it. I noticed you didn't have anything picked out to wear and I thought you could wear this. I mean if you want to."

I approach the dress and run my fingers over the antique cream-colored fabric. Most of the dresses my mom owned growing up were blue or gray. This dress stands out from her usual garments. It is beautiful in a simple way.

"Can I try it on?" I ask her.

"Of course, let me help you." My mother beams.

The dress is extravagant by district 12 standards and bland by Capitol standards. People usually just wore their reaping clothes or hand me downs from friends or family for a toasting. My mother's special dress was an unusual occurrence. It has soft flowing fabric that looks fitted but moves easily .The back falls into a deep v and the lace cap sleeves come slightly off the shoulder. It's so feminine and slight that I feel like an impostor wearing it. It belongs on someone equally as feminine like my mom or Prim. I sadden thinking of how beautiful Prim would have looked in this dress.

I breathe a sigh of relief as my mother fastens the last button on the fitts perfectly. Although I have a trunk full of dresses in the basement that I wore on the Victory tour I couldn't imagine wearing anything other than the dress that hangs on my body right now.

"Thank you mom. I love it." I say. My mother starts tearing up but catches herself.

"Good. I'm glad you like it " she manages to get out . "I drew a bath with lavender in it for you and you'd better hurry to enjoy the peace and quiet because the ladies are just off for an hour or so getting dressed for tonight. I can come back and help you get dressed if you'd like."

"I'd like that mom. Thank you."

She nods her head and leaves the room.

* * *

I soak in the bath for twenty minutes or so when I hear a tapping on the door.

"I'm not decent Effie." I shout as I rise from the bath wrapping myself in a towel. Suddenly the bathroom door opens and I almost scream from the startle it gives me. My fears are soon set to rest when my eyes settle on an out of breath red faced Peeta.

"What are you doing here ?I thought you were getting ready with the guys? Are you okay ? Is something wrong? "I begin to panic.

"Shhh. " He says as he grabs my face and kisses me as if he hasn't seen me in months. "I'm fine .I just missed you and had to see you before everyone got here. The girls had the door blocked and wouldn't let me in. Something about bad luck so I climbed up the trellis and in through the window."

"Are you insane ! You could have broken your neck!"

"I'm fine! What about you? How are you coping?" I think about it for a minute and realize the anxiety I was feeling earlier has all but disappeared.

"I'm actually excited. I feel great. I miss…" my words are interrupted by a firm tapping on the bedroom door.

"Katniss are you in there? The door's locked and we are behind schedule, Tick Tock." Effie says from behind the closed door.

Peeta and I begin to giggle like children.

"Coming Effie hold on." I shout "You're going to get us in trouble. You better go." I tell Peeta as I kiss him goodbye chastely.

"I love you." he says as he lowers his body out of the bedroom window.

"I love you too now go." I whisper .Once he is on his way I drop the towel I'm wear and motion to put on my robe.

"Totally worth the climb." Peeta says from the open window as he stares at my naked form. Apparently he never left.

"Would you go! You're impossible." I whisper throwing my towel at him.

"Okay I'm going. I love you ….I really going this time." He winks at me and disappears from site.

* * *

Soon Effie and my mother come in to help me dress. My mother braids my hair into a simple side braid and places Primrose flowers throughout the weaving. They're like a little piece of Prim that can be with me when she's can't be. I appreciate the small detail. Effie and I reached a compromise about my makeup. We settled for a light pink polish on my nails, a small amount of blush, and light lip stain .I wanted nothing and Effie wanted me looking like I stepped out of a Capitol fashion magazine so this was a happy medium. Soon I can hear the guest arriving and it's time to begin the toasting.

"Are you ready Katniss?" My mother asks.

I answer immediately and truthfully, "I'm actually surprised at how ready I am." I tell her smiling. With that we descend down the stairs where my new life is waiting to begin.

* * *

**Hopefully you all enjoyed this. Sorry for the wait, real life got in the way but I fully intend on bringing this story to completion so stick with it. As always your reviews and feed back are much appreciated.**

**After some suggestions from readers as well as for my own sanity I've decided I need a Beta, however I have no idea how that relationship works you have any recommendations or info please PM me ,thanks. Until next time :)**


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